Have you ever looked at couples that have been together for several decades and wondered how they did it? It’s not money, a big house, or endless gifts that kept them together. I’ve asked around, and found out that those couples have kept a few simple guidelines in their marriage that it would do us all some good to follow.
Communication is the key to any relationship – especially a marriage. Even preschool level television tells you to “use your words”, and it’s for a very good reason. As much as you’d like to believe that your partner is a mind reader, chances are, they’re not. And they won’t know how to make you happy if you don’t tell them. So make sure you communicate, even if sometimes you don’t want to!
Follow the Golden Rule
Do unto others as you would want done to you. It’s a very simple concept, yet very difficult for some people to grasp. If you wouldn’t want to be treated that way, chances are someone else wouldn’t either.
When you’re together, try to do things that you’ll both enjoy. At the very least, ask if your spouse minds if you take over the TV with the latest Lifetime movie. He may want to read the new issue of Car and Driver anyway. Maybe he will mind, and in that case, it’s nice to forego your movie and watch something you both enjoy. You can catch your movie another time when he’s busy doing his own thing.
Don’t trash his name all over town because he made you mad. Don’t tell him his mother is evil. He is a person too, and one that you love. Treat him with respect and dignity, and he will do the same.
Go to bed mad
Depending on who you talk to, going to bed mad can be either a good thing or a bad thing. Some say that going to bed mad isn’t so bad, because it gives you time to mull over what’s bothering you and find that it’s not so bad at all. Other people say that if you go to bed mad, you only wake up angrier in the morning so it’s best to work out your feelings and go to bed together. Figure out what type of personality you have, and go to bed (or don’t).
Don’t give up
The most important thing you can do to ensure a long and happy marriage is to never give up. I once saw a meme that said the secret to marital longevity is that if something is broken, you fix it. You don’t throw it away. I can’t think of better words to live by.
What are your secrets to a long and happy marriage?